Trust is and has always been a tricky subject in my life. Like most people I can state with conviction that many individuals in my life have lost and/or gained my trust. But unlike most people, I don’t think I’ve ever really trusted anyone fully (at least on my definition of “full”) … at least not since my childhood/teenage years, and those times seem so long ago. Who can really trust their memories fully? I doubt such a feat is possible. Perhaps it’s my adult perspective which creates this wall of mistrust I stand behind; perhaps it’s my skeptical nature.

I think trust has a lot to do with responsibly. I know a few people who, despite how much I care about them, I just cannot see to trust in certain situations because I know that they area and will be anything but responsible. Take, for example, the act of doing something you regret while drunk. You may say I’m sorry. You may say I didn’t mean too. And you may even be sincere. But we both know you are still blameworthy. It maybe just a loss of your inhibitions, but those are you inhibitions and you were the one who drank. All of those actions, events, and consequences are still yours. The claim that “it wasn’t me” is just false, it was you, and it was your act. You’re culpable in court, and I guess that means (at least in the instance I’m thinking of) you’re culpable in my world too. A drunk driver who hurts someone is guilty, there is no avoiding that.

We know how trust is lost. So what makes trust? Is it a long term association, one filled with honesty? Is it personality traits which agree among different individuals? To be honest I don’t really know. Then again, why should I? I’m the one who can’t trust anyone. In my life there are a slim few who I trust explicitly, without question. There are others who I would love to fully trust but because of who they are, what they are like, what they do, etc. I am never able to fully bring myself to. Why is that?

I’ll leave you with one last thought: Slinky + Escalator = Infinite Fun.

Still thinking of the right resolution for 2006. Maybe this article on keeping your resolutions will help.